Look at that face. No wonder she was the Beast. Lidia scrunched up her face remembering that at one time she had been cute. She had proof even; the newspaper had awarded her cutest kid in her town. Where had nature gone wrong these past years? She used a spare piece of paper to cover her mouth and nose. Her eyes, they were beautiful. Moving the paper to see only her mouth, pretty; nose, strong but cute; ears, if there were such a thing as ugly ears she wasn’t sure. Why was it that the pieces all seemed to have nothing wrong with them, but when put all together, hideous.

The Beast, really? Was she really that ugly to be called that? But then again, where normal teens would have pictures of themselves, she tore hers up. Lidia’s face always ended up red and splotchy in pictures. It wasn’t that way when she was just walking around she was sure, but in pictures, grotesque. She smiled and took a good look at her teeth. Maybe it was that her canines protruded a little too far. Yet, weren’t vampires considered pretty? At least some were, and theirs were much worse.

The decision wasn’t really up to her. She was the Beast. Lidia, was the ugly monster of Richland High weather she liked it or not. She pondered momentarily who had first called her that, but couldn’t remember. It all seemed like some cruel joke to show her the true worth of her life. At one time she had been popular, adored, cute even. Today she was a disgusting girl that was the base of jokes.

Matthew, what a gorgeous kind guy, heart of gold, smart and able to make anyone laugh. She couldn’t remember when she developed a crush on him, but it didn’t much matter now. When his friend came over to her, told her that he liked her, that he wanted to date her; and the look of disgust and horror on his face that she might think it was true. It hurt too much. She declined the offer for a date, she knew it was a joke, and the relieved sighs from her crush put a whole new meaning to that word. It crushed her heart, her soul.

From the age of 10 till the age of 17, Lidia had never been called anything short of ugly. I guess you could say her mother told her she was pretty, but she had to. Maybe that is why she gave up so thoroughly on any guy ever liking her, who could love the Beast? Oh yes, beauty and the beast, what a lovely movie. There is one problem with relating it to our story. Ugly isn’t a problem if you are a man, but though there may have been speculations in the school around her, Lidia was not a man. Men can be ugly and still get a girlfriend. Ugly girls were even sometimes snatched up. But Beasts, Lidias were not, never asked to a dance, never invited with friends, never thought of, never bothered with.

We fast forward to today. There was an awkward stage in there, but at age 17 she did get a boyfriend. Of course she met him online. Of course he agreed before seeing a picture. Of course it didn’t work out. There were others too, Lidia had found a secret. Men liked to be put down. If a girl puts down a man, he wants to be with her more. Just like the popular girls did to the Beast to become more popular. It is strange how people envy and love most the ones that put them down with insults.

Lidia’s current guy was like all the others, a complete geek. A guy who wasn’t what she wanted at all, but he was the kind of guy that she could make love her unconditionally and illogically. Of course she met him online. There were few males of the species that would take a second look at her if she didn’t rope him in with her learned skills first. But she wouldn’t let her family know. For some reason her family seemed to think she could actually get someone to like her if they saw her face first. Oh, she had tried that route, and it never worked. There was always some excuse to not have a second date, always some excuse to not be left alone. Those guys made up their mind before Lidia ever had a chance.

It hurt her now more than ever. It seemed men her age had grown into a sick humor. They told her she was pretty, though she hadn’t changed. They said her eyes were beautiful, so blue, even though they were barely grey. They said her smile was lovely, though it still procured the same chubby red-spot-laden cheeks and the same disproportioned teeth. They told her how sweet she was, and that may have been true, but how could someone not be sweet to everyone they met when they knew that no matter how ugly that person may be, attitude or look, they were more beautiful than she could ever hope to be. It had been too long, she had been called ugly Beast, Horrible things for too long. Lidia couldn’t see that maybe, they were right. Maybe she was pretty. But she could never know for sure, because in her heart, she would always be the Beast; the ugly wretch of Richland High; the horrible cursed blemish upon the face of the earth.

You may ask why I write such a sad story, how I know what Lidia thinks. It is because this story is true, and I am she. It may be that I have become less horrid, but I will never be sure, never fully believe that I am ANYTHING short of the BEAST.